Been hanging around in the studio, working/pretending to work. Buying weird junk for props from the Goodwill on Venice Boulevard, daydreaming, hanging out in the darkroom for the first time in years. Shooting in a way that feels more like wasting film than accomplishing anything. Writing in my journal. Thinking about my thesis and trying not to think about my thesis. Learning to accept myself as a total homebody who will always fail in social situations and is totally not cut out for going to gallery openings and making “connections.” Trying to read important art books and mostly just reading stupid nonsense on the internet. Trying to figure out why I decided to become a photographer (or should I call myself an artist, now that I am halfway to an MFA?).
Not down on myself in general or anything, just in a little slump. There’s work I want to do that I can’t do yet and I’m feeling stuck. I’m trying to work through it, but mostly just getting on my own nerves.